Nathan’s Struggle with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria Symptoms in Ted Lasso Season Two
- Caitlin Reid
- Jan 31
- 5 min read
Updated: Feb 1
Few character arcs in Ted Lasso are as heartbreaking and complex as Nathan Shelley’s descent into bitterness and betrayal in Season Two. What starts as a tale of triumph—the timid kit man becoming a respected coach—slowly morphs into a study of deep-seated insecurity, self-loathing, and ultimately, rejection.
More specifically, Nate’s actions, especially throughout the second season, can be viewed through the lens of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), a condition commonly associated with ADHD and other forms of neurodivergence, where perceived rejection, criticism, or failure is felt so intensely that it leads to extreme emotional responses.
While I am not suggesting the Nate character has ADHD or any other particular neurodivergence (aside from the argument that “genius,” a label frequently ascribed to Nate, is itself a form of neurodiversity), I’d like to use the opportunity to dive into a character trait that many neurodiverse people struggle with.
Check out my previous blog, Understanding and Managing ADHD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria in Filmmaking
Self-Loathing and the Spitting Ritual
One of the most visceral signs of Nate’s self-loathing is his habit of spitting, often at his own reflection. Initially, it’s a way to psych himself up, but over time, it becomes clear that this is an expression of deep-seated shame. It is suggested his shame and insecurity is rooted in his relationship with his father, a man who never offers the approval Nate so desperately craves.
Instead of encouragement, Nate’s father reacts to his achievements with dismissiveness, reinforcing a core belief that he is never good enough. When he has no mirror available, he spits at the ground or in the air — a symbolic act of contempt toward himself, one that grows more outward-facing as his bitterness intensifies.
Struggling to Accept Praise and Friendship
A defining trait of those with RSD is their inability to recognize genuine acceptance and praise, and Nate exemplifies this struggle throughout the season. When he receives genuine encouragement from Ted and the rest of the coaching staff, he frequently misinterprets it, seeing their support as pity or dismissing their praise altogether.
Even when Roy Kent acknowledges his tactical acumen with a simple “Great fucking work today,” Nate cannot let himself believe it. Instead, he seeks external validation in unhealthy ways—trolling social media for praise, obsessing over his public image, and lashing out at those beneath him.
Jealousy and the Arrival of Roy Kent as Coach
Nate’s insecurity intensifies when Roy Kent joins the coaching staff. In Rainbow (S2E5), we see the immediate flicker of resentment when Roy walks into the office. This isn’t just professional jealousy—it’s deeply personal. To Nate, Ted is the ideal father figure, and Roy’s arrival threatens the fragile sense of importance Nate has built for himself.
His resentment grows in The Signal (S2E6), when Roy’s impact on the team is immediately celebrated. To an outside observer, this may seem minor, but for someone with RSD, even the smallest shifts in attention can feel like devastating rejection.
This culminates in Man City (S2E8), when Nate falsely believes Ted has betrayed him. The truth is, Ted has continued to believe in Nate, even as his behavior has become more erratic. But in Nate’s dysphoric state, he cannot see this reality. Instead, he fixates on every perceived slight—every moment of inattention, every decision that doesn’t center him—and internalizes them as rejection.
Bullying as a Reflection of Internalized Shame
Another painful element of Nate’s transformation is his bullying of those with less power, particularly kit man Will and team player Colin. In Headspace (S2E7), Nate humiliates Colin by dismissing him as an irrelevant player, echoing the exact kind of dismissiveness he himself has endured from his father. This isn’t just cruelty—it’s a projection of Nate’s own deep-seated feelings of unworthiness. Hurt people hurt people, and Nate has been hurting for a long time.
His treatment of Will is even more troubling. When the team (prompted by Will) gives Nate a custom jersey with “Wonder Kid” on the back—a reference to Nate’s own accidental mispronunciation of “wunderkind”—Nate momentarily enjoys the gesture before fixating on his mistake.
Later, he cruelly accuses Will of mocking him and vows to make his life miserable. This moment is a perfect encapsulation of RSD: overwhelming shame from a minor perceived slight, which leads to an extreme and disproportionate emotional response.
The Betrayal of Ted Lasso
The most devastating moment of Nate’s arc comes in Midnight Train to Royston (S2E11) and Inverting the Pyramid of Success (S2E12). Nate leaks to journalist Trent Crimm that Ted suffered a panic attack during a match—a deeply personal and vulnerable moment for Ted.
While this act is undeniably cruel, it stems from Nate’s own feelings of betrayal. He believes that Ted abandoned him, though this perception is warped. In reality, Ted has done nothing but support him. But RSD distorts reality, making Nate feel like he was lifted up only to be discarded.
When confronted, Nate lashes out at Ted, accusing him of making him feel special only to neglect him. This outburst is heartbreaking because it reveals the core of Nate’s pain—he has always felt invisible, and when he doesn’t receive constant affirmation, he interprets it as rejection.
In his dysphoric state, he convinces himself that Ted has never truly cared about him, when in fact, Ted has kept the picture of them together that Nate presented to Ted as a gift on his dresser at home—a sign of personal significance that Nate cannot see.
The Hollow Victory and the Fall to West Ham
Nate’s final moments in Season Two are steeped in tragedy. Even after Richmond secures promotion, he does not celebrate with the team. He watches from the sidelines, hollow and disconnected, convinced that humiliation is inevitable.
Instead of basking in his success, he fixates on his pain. The final shot of the season reveals that he has left Richmond to become head coach at West Ham under Rupert Mannion, a man who will exploit Nate’s insecurities rather than nurture him.
Conclusion: A Tragic Arc Rooted in RSD
Nathan Shelley’s transformation in Season Two of Ted Lasso is one of the most compelling depictions of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria symptoms in television I have seen.
His inability to process positive feedback, his misinterpretation of Ted’s support, his desperate need for validation, and his lashing out at those beneath him all stem from deep-seated wounds. Rather than addressing his pain in a healthy way, Nate succumbs to it, allowing his self-loathing to poison his relationships.
While Season Three continues Nate’s story, his journey in Season Two remains a powerful and painful exploration of how rejection—real or perceived—can shape a person’s identity and actions.
And for those who have experienced RSD, Nate’s struggle is an all-too-familiar reflection of how deeply a wounded heart can distort the truth.
Do you struggle with rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD)? Are there other examples of characters you think may be experiencing RSD symptoms? Comment below!
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